Sunday, January 29, 2012

Table For One

  Being a "single" in a world largely filled with "pairs", once was, and still can be at times, daunting. Intimidating. Honestly, depressing. But I've learned to look for the perks and embrace my alone-ness. I used to envy the built-in adventure buddy that so many of my friends had. Another person to suggest awesome outings or memory making moments. I was left to my own devices and ideas.

  I'm not sure exactly when it happened, but I slowly came to realize that my "pair" friends were having the same boring Saturday nights I was. If I wanted to go do something, I was going to do it. Was I seriously going to wait until someone came into my life and told me, "Hey! Know what would be fun? Frisbee!!" Heck no!*  So I decided to start doing things by myself-going to movies, out for dinner, exploring the city. It became a mini mission to start making adventures of my own. There have been some awkward moments of my solo journey's, but there have been some great moments too. For example, when I decided to go see my first movie alone. There was a very small voice in the very back of my mind saying, "You know what's going to happen? You're going to walk into that theater and it's going to be filled with couples and groups who are all going to be thinking-What the?! Who goes to a movie alone?? Loser!" It was just a small voice, but it was there just the same. So, it was with a bit of apprehension when I turned to corner to find my seat in the theater(the movie was just starting) only to find it completely empty, save one person. Another person having a solo movie night. Awesome. I told that very small voice to shut it, found the best seat in the house and enjoyed the movie.

  I've become comfortable with being alone. I am by no means turning in my people-person badge, but as an overall extrovert, it's allowed me to indulge my introvert tendencies. It's given me a bit of a more balanced life.

  Some people get uncomfortable when single people talk about being single. There's a pained look of sympathy that sometimes crosses there face as if they're saying, "I'm just so sorry you have to live through this. Singleness. That is the. worst. Chin up, you'll make it through." There may be some of you reading this who are super uncomfortable with the fact that I'm drawing attention to the fact that you're uncomfortable. To you I say-I'm not living with a terminal illness. I'm not crying myself to sleep every night. I'm not constantly drowning my sorrows in Ben and Jerry's. I'm happy and always looking for the next adventure. I'm sorry if you're sad for me, but chin up, you'll make it through.

*Please don't think I try to play frisbee by myself, because that would be depressing. It was just an example.


  1. Great writing Jenn. It put a smile on my face.

  2. Love it, Jenn. And thanks for postiing that You Tube clip as well. Such serenity in it.

  3. That's awesome Jenn! And I loved the youtube video! Especially since moving into a new city and knowing nobody, I have realized there are some things that I actually prefer doing on my own. Where once I needed a partner for some activities, I now feel a deep satisfaction doing them on my own.

    Anyway, thanks for posting your thoughts on a regular basis. You are a gifted person.